Under the Facade
by Asoomy
Summary: The fight against the Black organization is heating up and so is the relationship between Conan and Haibara. When the secret is no longer a secret how far is either of them willing to go to protect the other and who is going be caught in the backlash of the ultimate struggle. Conan's first life against his second, his Angel of Light meets his Angel of Darkness
1. Chapter 1

**Under the Façade **

I don't own detective conan or any of the characters.

**Chapter One**

He fell to the ground with a thud. The rain, heavier than ever carried his blood all around the alley. His hair soaked in his own blood. The gun is still smoking, she drops to her knees with hand still on the trigger. She looks up, the rain hitting her face, hard. She didn't seem to mind, didn't seem to notice. Her breathing is heavy as she extends an arm to the side of his neck. She bows her head for a few seconds then looks up again, he's dead and I can't believe what I just saw.

She turned her face towards me, her eyes deep and empty and her face emotionless, she slowly got to her feet and started walking towards me. I wanted to run but my legs wouldn't, as I stared at the gun in her hand. Her steps are slow and steady, two meters away and she doesn't stop. Under the hood of her jacket, her hair was dripping reddish drops of water, blood and water shine under the moonlight. My legs don't budge, I try to scream but no sound comes out, not even a whisper. She's so close now and I could clearly see her face. Her eyes are deep blue and incredibly miserable. Her lips are pale from the cold, the corner of her forehead is dripping with blood that travels all the way down to her neck and towards the rest of her body. Everything about her was lifeless.

She moves her gun less arm to the collar of my shirt then squeezes at my shoulder and then slowly lets go. She takes a few steps back with her eyes still on me, turns her back to the wall then drops to the floor. The movement caused the hoodie to fall of her head. I know her, well not really. It was her hair, her hair was frightinly familiar, that short strawberry blonde hair of hers. Have I seen her before? Do we go to the same school? I didn't know and I didn't stick around to find out. I could feel my legs starting to respond to my commands again and so I ran faster than I ever have. She could have been dead or she could have been roaming the streets looking for the next kill. But I just ran for my safety and I ran for my life.

My heart is still racing, my legs throbbing with pain. I don't stop running until I crash into the apartment door. I turn my head back to the dark wet street, waiting for a shadow to emerge into the light, nothing. I knock hard on the door, beyond that door, I'm safe I have to get through this door. The door swings open and a suited man stands before me. I'm too scared to talk so I just run past him, past everything and straight into his arms. He was shocked, everyone was. I dug my head deep into his shoulder not wanting to let go of the warmth of his embrace, he gently pushed away after a while

"What happened?" he asks wearing a concerned look. I say nothing for a while, he is looking me in the eyes. "He's dead" everyone shifts at their feet. "Who's dead?" he asks placing his hands on my shoulder. "Amuro-san, he worked at the café next to the agency"

"DID YOU SEE IT HAPPEN? DID THEY SEE YOU?" Taken aback from his outburst I took a couple of steps back. I look around and everyone is staring, everyone is waiting. I turn my eyes back to him and I'm scared all over again.

"Y-yeah she saw me I-"he yelled out in frustration and the room got too noisy too fast.

"What did she look like?" I can hear the urgency in his voice.

"Foreign, maybe American or English a blonde- "he drops his head in frustration.

"Did she do anything to you? Did she hurt you?" he asks with a shaky voice "she just touched me then dropped to the floor I don't know if she's dead or alive I just got out of there" my voice is shaky and tears are blocking my vision. He rests my head on his shoulder for a while.

"Two of their best are dead this is too good to be true" Jodie wonders. "Why would they kill their own?" someone says. "It's not n their best interest" said another. I was scared before but now I'm just confused. I ask him. He doesn't respond, he just guides me away.

A couple of hours and I'm sitting in a bed, a doctor has come to see me, see if I'm doing okay mentally I guess. I stand and look around the room. It's simple, nothing but a small bed and cupboard. I'm about to walk out of the room when the door clicks and in he comes.

"How are you feeling?" he asks

"I'm not hurt if that's what you're asking" he gives a small smile. Nothing is was said for the next few minutes which was more than I could take. "What's going on Shinichi?" I ask him "you texted me this address saying that you'll be here and that I must come to you but why? Where are we? Why are the FBI here and who is that woman I saw murder Amuro-san?" I ask in one breath frustrated from the lack of information.

"Ran this is the case that I have been working on" he begins in a soft voice "this is a place where you will be safe where you will be protected by the FBI in case someone tries to hurt you in order to get to me". I want to ask him why anyone would want to hurt him but he holds up a finger to silence me "as for that woman she is one of the criminals that we are after" he pauses to make sure I'm digesting all the information he is providing me "she is a part of an organization that has been around for decades responsible for murders, kidnappings, bombings, extortion and pretty much everything in between-"

The door swings open and a man wearing the official FBI jackets enters "we have an unidentified access to the premises!" he tells Shinichi who springs to his feet screaming at me to stay in this room and then joins the rest of the crowd outside. Curiosity got the better of me and I walk out of the room and into the rush of noise. Guns were pointed to the door, Shinichi was holding what looked like a stun gun. Shinichi's mum who I haven't noticed until then peeks through the peep hole on the door "false alarm she's a friendly" she announces as she hurries to unlock the padlock on the door.

A woman falls through the door. The woman. She holds a hand to her bleeding side as she stands and stumbles to her feet. She stands up straight and her face is as lifeless as ever, she is still holding the gun. Shinichi starts walking towards her and I want to scream but for the second time that night my voice fails me. He reaches for her side and his face is swimming in fear and concern and I can see him sweating as he places his hand on her bloody skin and shouts out for a medic. His body shakes as he looks down and sees her blood all over him.

She pushes him away hard and he falls to the ground he is about to say something to her when she speaks in a cold voice "I think your girlfriend might have something to say first". Everyone turn to look at me and I'm looking at her and I begin to shake as the image of Amuro-san's body falling to the ground flashes through my mind.

"It was her" I say "it was her! She killed him!" I scream. The room is silent.

TBC

Chapter two soon. Reviews and suggestions welcomed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Under the Façade **

I don't own detective conan

**Chapter two**

She's looking at me through her glassy eyes. She wears a blue sweat shirt over a grey tank top which might as well be red from all the blood. I look over at Shinichi and he is screaming out for help as he holds her in his arms, I don't understand. He falls to the ground, she looks at me. "I think your girlfriend might have something to say first" she speaks. I see him die in my mind again, I see his body drop to the ground. I see his blonde hair fluttering in the wind. I see her kill him. "It was her, I was her she killed him!" yell out.

She doesn't flinch. She stands tall and strong. I look at her and she's looking at me then she smiles, a scary smile and she shifts her gaze to him. He stares at her with wide open eyes finally noticing the gun in her hand, his tongue twisting and turning desperate to form the words but not able to. He turns to me "Ran that's crazy" he states. I feel angry. I don't know her but he does. He believes her not me.

"I killed him" she announces. Her eyes never leave his. His bloody hand shakes. He looks up and down, left and right, anywhere but her. She holds her stare at him. "What?" he finally says, tone full of doubt. She raises the gun in hand and points it at him. Everyone draws their weapons. He steps in between the two sides, clearing her of all danger. He reaches a hand to the gun and for a second a little grin flashes across his face "if you wanted to kill me, I'd already be dead" he says as she hands his the gun "what happened?" he asks.

She sighs and her gaze travels to the ceiling "I was hoping I'd have a little more fun messing with your head" scare smile turns into a sad one "I got the text you sent telling me to stay put and that you would be coming soon but there was no way I was going to risk coming out of Hakase's as me" he wants to talk but one look from her silences him "so I thought I'd go someplace where I won't endanger anyone and pop the pill" she chuckles.

Her stare falls to the ground "the plan was to tell you where I was so that you could come pick me up from there but once I 'changed' and walked out, it wasn't you that was waiting for me" her eyes land on him "Bourbon" he says. She nods.

"He led me to an alley which funny enough I always pictured that's where I would die and bang" who's Bourbon? I didn't see her get shot? Was it before I got there? I steal a glance at Shinichi, he's hurting "I had managed to move just enough for the bullet to fly right through, it wasn't fatal. Obviously" she exhales "he walked over and crouched next to me told me how he has been looking for me and how he thought I had already died on that train you know the usual stuff. While he was talking I was able to reach for his gun and pull the trigger, my aiming was better than his he died"

His eyes is sharp. He looks at her and even though she doesn't react, I know she is burning under his gaze. "Bullshit" he says "bullshit" he repeats "you can act as cold as you want but I know you would never kill anyone like that. I know that you would never stoop down to their level and that is precisely why you are not one of them because that is the difference between us and them and I also know you would never avenge yourself but killing anyone. So tell me what really happened" he is not asking.

Her face hardens, the blue of her eyes seem to turn gray. "That is the story Kudo take it or leave it" her tone is final. She starts stumbling through the room, walking towards the medic. He walks over to her and throws both hands on her shoulders pinning her to the wall. She shouts out in pain. "Why did you kill him?! Why?!" his voice trembles and his eyes begin to water. His mom hurries and pulls him away from her screaming at him to let her go. That he's hurting her.

As I watch the scene unfold before my eyes I can't help but cry. Cry at her pain. Cry at his despair. They are close. I can see it, he punches the wall in frustration and I understand why. He spent all his life chasing down criminals and murderers who did the exact same thing, he was always fighting for justice but now looking at her he can't bring himself to label her as a murderer. Not before knowing why.

She's on the ground whimpering in pain. He looks at her and guilt washes over him. He walks over to her and crouches beside her trying to help her to her feet. As he reaches his hand to hers she pushes him away again and he falls to the ground. She sits up her back on the wall and tears are on the verge of breaking loose. "You want to know what happened, I'll tell you" her eyes are dangerous and her mouth twitches as she talks "he did shoot me and I did reach for his gun and I did kill him, but no I didn't do it for me. I was willing to die I was longing to die" her voice breaks and so do the tears "but I couldn't let him live. Not after he said your name"

No one talks. No one moves. Only the sound of her struggling to her feet and pushing past him as she walks away could be heard. I don't understand what's happening here, not all of it but I know that she killed him for Shinichi and from what I've come to realize, Amuro-san wasn't my dad's prodigy nor was he a good man. But she killed him for Shinichi and she never wanted to tell him, she never wanted him to bear the weight of taking a life. But she could only be pushed so far.

"Please take care of her" was the last thing he said before walking out the door.

TBC

Reviews and suggestions welcomed


	3. Chapter 3

Author's note: some scenes from this story will include events and flashbacks from my other story 'Memories to Treasure'. You may want to read it first if you want to understand the full picture.

**Under the Façade **

I don't own detective Conan or any of the characters

**Chapter three**

Shinichi's POV

I walk. Then I jog. Then I run. I'm running as fast as my legs can go breathing heavy not looking around, not looking ahead. My legs give in underneath me and I fall to my knees. Desperate for air, I look up at the night sky, at the shining moon. I look down at my hands, at the purple spreading through them from the cold.

Who is to blame?

Shiho's POV 

I haven't moved for hours. I lay on this bed, looking up at the ceiling. I shouldn't have told him. I should not have told him. Knowing him, he is going to find a way to blame himself for what happened. I should not have told him. My eyes shift from the ceiling to the wound on my side, a little red spot under the cover of the bandage. Not my first time getting shot, probably not the last. I wonder if the next will be the end.

What happens now Kudo?

Ran's POV

Dawn's breaking. The sun is rising. He hasn't come back. She hasn't come out. No one talks throughout the night. Many of the FBI agents have left each carrying a mission of their own. Shinichi's mom came to check on me and then took me to one of the rooms suggesting I sleep for a while. She smiles as she guides me into the room assuring me that everything is going to be fine by morning. I know she's worried about Shinichi but she's also worried about _her_. No one would even tell me her name.

As I wait in bed for him to come back I run through everything I saw during the night, the many faces I've seen her wear and I can't help but wonder which of them was true. The picture of her pained face after Shinichi pushed her to the wall flashes through my head and I wince back deeper into the sheets. I have never seen him hurt anyone let alone someone he clearly cares about. Just who is she?

The sun is up and I haven't slept a wink. I walk out to the living room which is empty except for the two guards standing by the door keeping watch. I sit down on one of the sofas and keep waiting for him like I always seem to do. FBI, how did he get himself involved with them? What is this case exactly? He tried to explain to me but that's when she came in and everything went from bad to worse. There is a little smear of blood on the floor where she fell last night. Despite everything I really hope she is okay.

A knock on the door brings my train of thoughts to a halt. One of the guards looks through the door and then silently opens it. Shinichi gives him a small nod and walks in. My head turns as he walks by me and he then sees my reflection on one of the glass windows. He turns to face me "I didn't see you there," he says walking up and taking a seat next to me.

"Are you okay?" I ask him. He says nothing for a while. His head drops into his hands. The heel of his palms digging deep into his eyes. When he looks at me he looks exhausted and beat. I can see the frustration spilling out of him and my heart aches for him and I reach for him taking hold of his hand. He starts leaning on me. I can feel his breath on my neck.

He sits up after a while. "Thanks Ran," he says with a weak smile. I watch him as he scans the room with the intense force of his gaze. His eyes travel all around before finally landing on the drops of blood on the floor. A mask of guilt covers his face and for a second, his body shakes. He looks down at his hands seeing red no doubt. He shakes his head and looks down on them again. They're clean. I'm watching like I never have before, watching him like I've never known him before. I don't know this side of him.

"It must be freaking you out, all of this." he says tilting his head to look at me. Pain in his eyes.

"Well that's one way to put it" I reply giving him a reassuring smile. "She hasn't woken up yet," I tell him anticipating his next question.

"Did a doctor see her?" he asks.

"Yea, he said she should be fine the wound wasn't fatal. She was lucky the bullet travelled all the way through, she just needs rest that's all," I assure him.

"No one has seen her since?"

"Your mom did" I tell him.

He looks thoughtful for a while and says nothing. His eyes land on the again and he shakes again. "Who is she?" I ask him, unable to keep the eagerness out of my tone "at least tell her name".

"There is a lot that I haven't told you," he begins "and I wish I could. I wish I could tell you everything. I wish that all of this would be over. This is nothing like any case I ever worked on and you must have realized that by now. I can't tell you because people who know about this tend to get killed and I can never put you in a situation as dangerous as this," his voice starts to shake with the rest of his body "guilt and grief at every corner. This is no way to live" he takes a deep breath and his stare travel to my eyes "she is the guilt. She is the innocence. She is the hatred. She is the love. She is the grief. She is the hope," his expression softens "everything about her is her own story to tell. You want to know about her just ask her, I think she might tell you" he finishes.

It's frustrating. The more answers I get the more questions emerge. She is the hatred and the love, what does that mean? Does he love her? Does he hate her? Does he blame her? Endless questions and I want answers but I'm also afraid of them…what if he loves her?

He stands up to leave "second door to your right, her room." I tell him what he wants to know.

Shinichi's POV

I stand outside her door. 'She is the hatred. She is the love' where did that come from. Words just started flowing out of my mouth and I didn't think about what I'm saying or _who_ I'm talking to. I push the thought out of my head as I knock softly on the door. No answer. I open the door slowly and take a look inside. She is laying one the bed with a hand over her wound. I close the door behind me and start walking towards her. There is dry blood on her hand. The fire of guilt flickers brighter inside me.

I pull the chair away from the desk facing the window, and take a seat next to the bed. Her chest rises and falls slowly. The hand on her wound falls to the side of the bed and she turns to face me. She looks pale. She looks beautiful. I can't help but smile. I wonder. I can't help but wonder, who she would have been if it weren't for them. I watch her face. I watch her hair. I watch her lips. And I drift off to sleep.

Shiho's POV

A sound wakes me up from my sleep. I open my eyes but I don't move. It's soft and steady. I push myself up on the bed ignoring the pain soaring through me and rest my head against the wall behind me. I turn to the noise and I see him sitting next to me, facing me, sound asleep. And I can't help but smile and laugh which hurts. He looks awful. His hair is messy, his shirt is painted with blood. My blood. His head is resting against his shoulder. Can't be healthy.

I'm wearing a white shirt instead of my grey one. I don't know at what point I changed clothes seen as I blacked out while the medic was taking care of the wound. I can only hope it was Kudo's mom who did it. I look out the window and the sun shines but the heat never makes it into the room. I check my phone for the time and see that it's evening already. I look over at him again and he looks too comfortable for my liking. I kick him awake.

He stirs and grumbles as his eyes flutter open. He looks at me unsure of where he is and then his face is filled with guilt and I know he is truly awake now. "You snore like a pig," I tell him.

He posture turns to defensive the way it always does whenever we argue and for a second it feels like everything is back to normal. Just for a second. He drops whatever he was about to say and drop his head in shame "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I never meant to hurt you," I can't believe how desperate he sounds.

"I don't know what came over me I just lost it and I'm so sorry," his voice is shaking. His body is shaking and I'm looking at him, truly seeing him and I smile.

"Nothing I say or do is ever going to make up for what I did and I know that. I just want you to know that I will never hurt you again-"he looks up at me and he sees me smiling.

I can see the hurt in his eyes. I can hear the pain in his voice and I can't help but think, he is just like me. "I don't ever want to hear you sounding like that ever again" I tell him. He is looking at me not knowing what to say "I hurt you," I hear him finally says.

"I'm kind of glad that you did" I begin "I killed someone. I wasn't expecting you to congratulate me. I knew that you wouldn't like it. I knew that for someone like you taking a life might seem inexcusable and it may be. The fact that you did get angry about it shows just how good a person you really are" I keep smiling at him "I'm sorry to have told you the truth, I let my emotions get the better of me and I am sorry about that. I expect you somehow turned all that's happened making it seem like it was your fault and if that's true then you are the one who needs help not me. You are not perfect. No matter how close you might be, no matter what everyone might believe. You are not perfect and you can't expect yourself to be so don't blame yourself for what happened. It's just human nature," I conclude, my smile turning into a smirk.

"Thank you Haibara," he says. Voice full of relief.

"That aside, do you know how creepy it is to sneak into a girl's room and watch her sleep. What is wrong with you?" I say sarcastically.

"Yea Yea whatever, oh and by the way do I really snore?" he eagerly asks.

"Like a pig," I tell him.

"Bullshit" he grumbles not looking too sure. My lips form a smirk.

He starts for the door "I'm sorry if my snoring cost you your beauty sleep" he says smiling back at me as he walks out the door.

I look at the chair where he sat a minute ago. I reach for the inside pocket of my jeans and fish out my half of that day. I look at my face in the pictures. I look at his. I look at the smile on my face and wonder would I ever wear it again.

Shinichi's POV

I reach for the pictures in my back pocket. I hold them up to my face and I smile. Her laugh. God her laugh is amazing. The way her hair flows as she shakes with laughter. The way her eyes shine with happiness. But we can never talk about that. I remember her laugh which reminds me of her kiss. The way her hands travelled to my face. The way her fingers dug deep into my hair. The way her lips pressed against my cheek. I'm seeing her kiss right in front of me. I look at the picture and I can feel the heat surging through me. 'She is the hatred. She is the love' I told Ran and when I think about it, that sums her up quite well.

I shove the pictures to my pocket again and head towards the living room. An arm pulls me hard through a door to my right. I look up and see my mom staring at me. Smiling like she always does. "What?" I ask her annoyed.

"How is she?" she asks back concerned.

"She is okay. Needs rest that's all," I assure her.

"How are you?" she asks this time a little more serious.

"I'm fine no need to worry about me,"

She says nothing but instead she just looks me in the eye "would you have done the same thing?" she asks, I have never seen her more serious.

My mouth hangs open. I would. I know I would. Wouldn't I? I didn't think about that the whole time. I was busy thinking how I would apologize for what I did to her but I never stopped and really thought about that. Would I kill for her? I know I'd put my life on line to save her but would I risk the life of any other?

"I'm not asking you because I want you to kill for her. That is up to you and what you believe is right. I'm asking you because you have to understand how much she is willing to lose for you. No matter how much it may hurt her she will do anything to keep you safe. She feels like that's her job and in the end it might cost her too much. All I am saying is keep her by your side you need her a lot more than you think," she says.

She doesn't wait for me to respond "people are going to die, you can't lose yourself every time it happens. Odds are not all of us are going to make it. Better accept that" she tells me. She lays hand on my shoulder her face all cheerful again "see you around" she smiles and walks away whistling happily.

Ran's POV

The room that was empty this morning is now swarming with agents. I haven't seen her yet but I have seen Shinichi. He looks better than he did this morning, doesn't look as hurt. I see him talking to some of the agents, not wanting to disturb him I walk into the kitchen. Filling my glass of water I take a seat on the bench on the center of the room, that's when she walks in. She walks slow but steady. She sees me and gives a plastic smile. I return the smile.

I watch her as she fills her glass. 'She is the love. She is the hatred'. The words ring through my head so loud that I have to shake it off. "Are you okay?" she asks me.

"Yea I'm fine, how are you feeling?"

"I've been through worse" the way she says it, I know it's true.

Who are you? What is this organization? How do you know Shinichi? Do you love him? Questions are flying through my head, not a single one reaching my mouth. She slowly places the glass down and starts walking back without another glance. I stand up too quickly and the chair makes a scraping noise. I walk over to her and extend my hand "Mouri Ran, nice to meet you," I say. I need to know her name.

She watches my hand and gives me another fake smile "Pleasure" she says taking my hand. She starts walking away again and I can't help but ask "what is your name?" too eager to know.

"People who know my name tend to get killed" she says as she walks away.

I walk out of the kitchen too frustrated to think about my first conversation with her. I walk into the living room. The buzz of the noise is overwhelming, some faces are anxious, some are scared. He sees me and walks towards me "things are a little crazy at the moment, we have lost track of their movements" he tells me. Jodie sensei is trying to shout something over the noise but it's too hard to hear. As faces turn to look at her the noise starts to quite down. She waits for the noise to die, it gets lower and lower until it is only a whisper. Then it's dead.

The room is dead quite. Jodie starts to speak but a clicking sounds from the wall across the room. That's when the first bomb explodes. Everyone falls to the ground. He is next me with an arm stretched over me for protection. Another clinking sound. Another bomb explodes. Shinichi's mom runs over to us and yells at us to run. He lifts me up and I make the mistake of looking up. Two, three, four I'm counting the bodies on the floor and a lump forms in my throat. He is dragging me behind him running for the exit.

Smoke and fire. We run not able to see. Barely able to breathe. But we run and run and I can hear people yelling out orders and I can hear people dying and bombs are going off one after another. The explosions are small but there are too many of them and they are everywhere. He knows where to go because he is running but he has that fiery look in his eyes. We walk into the room I stayed in last night and Jodie is there and so is Shinichi's mom. "Go!" she yells pointing at the trash chute on the wall. "Where is she?!" Shinichi yells over another explosion. "She went ahead," his mom says.

We slide down the chute and fall into the soft-smelly bags of garbage. He helps me up and start running towards the exit. He twists his head around looking for her, finally spotting her near the exit. Waiting for him.

"Do you have the gun I gave you?" she asks Shinichi her voice breathless.

"No I handed it over to the FBI," he tells her.

She swears under her breath and pulls a gun and hands it to him "you know how to use it. Don't hesitate if you have to" she tells him and starts running the other way.

He reaches for her arm and brings her face to face with him "where are you going?" he yells "we have to go the other way,"

"I can't be seen with you, too dangerous I'll get out the other side just go the safe house I'll meet you there," she yells back.

"I'm not leaving you! I'm already in this what difference does it make if we're seen running together!"

"Working with the FBI and working with me are two different things! Gin will be after you if we are seen together so just go!"

We are standing there. One arm holding me, one hand trying to hang on to her "I promised you I would protect you and I'm going to keep that promise" he yells at her.

"Kudo you got me this far! I could never ask for more!"

"Just come with me!" he is begging her.

She closes the distance between them till their only an inch apart "Kudo, please you have to go, I'll find you but I can't risk your life because a life without you isn't a life worth living-" she is looking into his eyes "so would you stop trying to be the hero for one second and just trust me," she reaches into her pocket and pulls out what look like a picture and buries it into his pocket "can't be caught with that on me" she says smirking. With a swift movement she knocks his arm away and sprints into the dark.

He stands frozen. So much happened in so little time. He turns to look at me "let's go" his voice empty.

Shiho's POV 

I run and I cry. Tears are blocking my vision and I wipe them away without stopping. I told him. Not everything but some of it. The tension of their presence is so strong that I don't bother with looking for the source. I take another turn and a spike in the tension forces me to turn and look around. In the dark. In the cold. The familiar bang of a gun. A bullet tears right through me. The fate of a traitor.


End file.
